Car Thoughts

• What the fuck kind of bird is THAT?
• Billboard-"Jesus Christ is still coming"- Maybe "still on his way" would be a better choice of phrase.
• Hey dude! I can totally see you over there picking your nose! Good dog, is there a treasure up in there or what?
• You, Mr. Dick Motorcycle Man, are why people dislike motorcyclists. You, personally.
• I've invented brain yoga!
• AAAARGH! Not again with the Lady Antebellum! I think I may throw up.
• You are so right, I should only be doing 60 on the highway. Thank you for being in the fast lane and preventing me from speeding. Your goodness will be rewarded in heaven.
• I want Michelle Obama arms.
• I hope no one notices that I have two different socks on.
• I just burnt my uvula.
• ♪Silent e is a ninja. Silent e is a ninja.♫

Things they never taught you in Sunday school

First of all, let me ask you all where the time has gone? Last post was in January. Alas, I am not a dedicated blogger, folks. And now, let's get to the subject of this post. It was going to be about our magnificent (and when I say magnificent, I mean magnificent! Not kinda fun, or sorta cool, or even splendid, I mean magnificent!) trip to Chicago to celebrate our anniversary and to worship at the altars, I mean restaurants, of Rick Bayless. Instead, I find myself compelled to share with you a spiritual lesson I learned on my refrigerator the other morning. No, it's not the image of the Virgin Mary made out of the smudges on the front of the fridge door. It's not a message from the Creator spelled out in alphabet magnets. It's something Ike created. I'm sure he is destined to become one of the great religious and spiritual leaders of the future. (Oh, and yes, this is made from a set of Nativity magnets. And yes, they are still there from Christmas. Don't judge!) Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the gospel according to Ike- Apparently, in this little known version of the story, baby Jesus (that scamp!) has decided to use his godly powers to ride on the star-that-shone-in-the-east's tail. In this close up, you can clearly see that both baby Jesus and the star are having a high-ole-time! Both shouting, "Wheee!" One of the biggest mysteries of this escapade was why He took the manger with him. Was it like a rocket ship or a magic carpet? Or was it because he enjoyed lounging whilst cavorting through the heavens? I will have to leave that up to your interpretation, my friends. The other aspect of this scenario that needs our attention is the reaction of the Lord's parents. Take a look at what is happening in this close up. Joseph is yelling, or exclaiming loudly, "Come Back!" But he doesn't look particularly alarmed that his son is traipsing through the skies on the tail of a star. His unconcerned smile seems to be saying, "Oh that boy!" in a proud papa kind of way. His hands extended in a little shrug of, whataya gonna do with him? And Mary? She sits with a benign smile on her face, hands folded in prayer. Maybe she is doing what all mothers do and is closing her eyes when the kids are doing something reckless. The way I do when my boys are skateboarding down the hill at break-neck speeds or when they were smaller and would hurl themselves down the slide. The way I will do when they drive away from me in the car the first time they drive solo. There she is, hands folded, face calm, silent prayers sent to heaven that He will come home safe. That is what Mary is doing. I have to admit that I'm never that calm about the whole recklessness thing though. Obviously, this is one of the reasons she was chosen to be the mother of the Lord, she can remain calm even in extreme situations! I guess being the parents of a supreme being can be challenging, but you just have to have the right mindset about it all. So, children, what have we learned today in class? Well, in the book of Ike, chapter one, the Lord is an irrepressibly fun-loving being. Not a bad way to look at it if you ask me.

Questions

Let's say that you are out on a cool and cloudy Saturday afternoon, taking a walk in a lovely wooded park. You are walking on a wide paved trail (it's actually what used to be a street through a subdivision), enjoying your music, the brisk weather, the exercise. Now, walking in front of you is a woman with two dogs on leashes. You notice that she is having some difficulty with the dogs. They are medium to largish dogs and are very excited. They are bouncing along the trail, pulling at the leashes, going in opposite directions. At one point, she does some kind of spin around thing to untangle the leashes. And then, oh no!, her ipod is falling out of her pocket and as she is rearranging and putting earbuds back in, she removes one of her gloves and it falls to the ground. This all happens while she is continuing to walk.

Question: Do you call out to the woman? Alert her to the mishap? Maybe yell something like, "Hey crazy dog lady! You dropped your glove, you may want to get it!" Or something else along those lines. You could maybe even pick it up and hand it to her. (Crazy idea, I know!) Or, do you choose the schmuck way and just let her continue walking for a quarter mile until she goes to put her glove back on and discovers that it isn't under her arm where she had tucked it while she wrangled with leashes and earbuds?

Question: When said woman realizes she has dropped her glove and now has to turn around and go back a quarter mile to get it and that you had to have noticed her glove falling to the ground way back there and chose not to tell her, is it ok for her to set loose the hounds on your inconsiderate ass?

Final question: Do you know how hard it is to clean up the dogs when they are all schmutzic?

Here's what I think

Which is a totally stupid title for a blog post, because what is a blog post other than what the author thinks? That's the point, right? Here's what's been rattling around in my noggin, and now you get to read it. That is the definition of blog. So, on to what I've been thinking.



This may take awhile, my brain has been stuffed full with thoughts. Some interesting (interesting to me, anyway), some silly, some serious. It's a whole mishmash up in there!



First, let's start with Charley. The dude is fantastic. Who's Charley? Why he's only the newest member of our household. A sweet boxer boy we got from Mulligan Mutts rescue. He is magnificently cute and wonderfully smart. I will hear no arguments on this. Ok, well, I have heard the argument from the cat on this point. His position is that Charley is a big, dumb oaf. A big, dumb oaf determined to lick him like a lollipop. And since he has no desire to be licked like a lollipop, he stays as far away from Charley as he can and detests him with every furry fiber of his little kitty cat being. But the cat is the only one in the house who doesn't like him. The rest of us are pretty taken with him.



I could bore you with all the cute things he does, but new pet owners can be just as obnoxious as new parents when it comes to sharing unwanted details about how their pet/baby is the best pet/baby that ever lived. Cuter, smarter, funnier, destined for better things than your pet/baby. So, I will just share one small detail. (Humor me here) When we go for our early morning walks, he looks into every storm sewer along the way. Every. Single. One. I'm not sure what he's looking for, but watching him staring down into the storm sewer, his brow furrowed in concentration, his ears perked up, his body half backing up, half leaning forward-I'm curious, I'm wary-makes me laugh. Hopefully there aren't any C.H.U.D.s down there. Lard. I never thought of that possibility until JUST NOW! AHHH! No more dog walking for me. I don't want to be eaten by some Cannibalistic Humanoid Underground Dweller. Nope. Not a good way to start the day.



What's that? Do I have a picture of him? Why yes, I do. Why don't you sit down and make yourself comfortable, I've got a whole album full. Nah, just messin' with you. Here's one of my favorites. By the way, he's named for the famous pugilist Charley Burley. If you don't know who he is, go here to read about him. http://http//charleyburley.com/index.htm And truthfully, he already had the name Charley. I just googled famous boxers named Charlie, and that's what appeared. It makes for a good story though, oui?

Let's see, what else is going on...



I really can't remember any other thing. The whole idea of cannibalistic humanoids wandering underneath my subdivision has chased all the thoughts out of my head.



Oh wait, here it is. And it has nothing to do with dogs or C.H.U.D.s. Unless C.H.U.D.s are God's retribution on city slickers.



Let's talk about folks who say that natural disasters are God's way of punishing folks. I'm gonna get all churchy on you here, so feel free to exit this post now if that isn't your thing.


Let us all open our Bibles to the 9th chapter of John.

"As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, "Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?"

"Neither this man nor his parents sinned," said Jesus, "but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life. As long as it is day, we must do the work of him who sent me. Night is coming, when no one can work. While I am in the world, I am the light of the world."



Bad stuff happens in this world. Really bad stuff. Sometimes it affects just a few people, sometimes it affects thousands. Hurricanes, tornados, earthquakes, tsunamis, volcanos, mudslides, droughts, floods-all natural disasters that can kill thousands of people and leave thousands more homeless. We hear about them and we look to the sky and raise our hands to heaven and ask, "Why?" We want an explanation. We want the world to make sense. And it just doesn't. Being weak and frightened, we want to rule out the possibility that something similar could happen to us, so we blame it on the wrong-doing of the people suffering the tragedy. "Surely these were people who deserved this. I on the other hand am living right. I don't have to worry."


And then in John, chapter 9, Jesus says, (and I paraphrase here. What audacity! Paraphrasing the Lord!) "Nope. Has nothing to do with sin and everything to do with showing the work of God." And the work of God, as far as I've been able to cotton, is love. "The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love" Galatians, chapter 5" The only thing. The ONLY thing.

Bad things happen, that is the way of the world. And in responding with love to those bad things, we are doing the work of God on earth. We are called to be the light to others foundering in the darkness. Whatever form that darkness takes.


The horrible earthquake in Haiti is not some divine retribution. If God deals in that kind of retribution, I need to go outside and wait for the lightning bolt.


The next time you want to rail at the Almighty, screaming, "Why?" Ask yourself if it is an opportunity that God is giving you to spread the light of His love.


Thank you and we will now sing hymn 342 and pass the plate. Amen.

Puppy Love

Note to a puppy:

Sure, you're cute, with your sweet puppy breath and your little puppy teeth and your cute puppy wrinkles and your soft puppy fur and your floppy puppy ears. Sure, you lure me in with all of those things and then the next thing you know, you're peeing on my carpet and chewing my couch.

Oh, I'm wise to your ways, Puppy. And I was able to resist your charms in the store. I held you in my arms and rocked you to sleep and then said, "NO! No puppy! It's too cold for potty training now. Too much work to put everything up out of its reach! Too stressful to worry about having to come home and let him out every few hours."

And I was fine with that decision in the store. Perfectly, utterly fine.

Only now? Now, I'm thinking about driving back to that store and getting you and bringing you home! Damn you, Puppy! Damn you and your irresistable sweetness!

So this is 2010...

Now listen, I could make some big resolution to blog everyday in January, but let's all face the fact that I've already missed the first day, so that resolution is screwed. I almost got out of bed last night to post something, just so I could make that my resolution and then I said, "aw f#(% it. I'm tired." Which, I suspect, is how many people handle New Year's resolutions.

Ok, now here's the real deal on my resolutions. Or resolution. They are still not fully formed, except this one. Forgiveness.

This craziness all started when I read the book, "The Shack". Many people I know have read the book. They've told me how wonderful they found it to be-"life-changing", "thought-provoking"-all those hyphenated praises that people give to books. I resisted. I'm still in an I don't know what I believe kind of place, so I didn't want some crazy book about a guy in a shack talking to God to scramble my brain any further. I resisted and resisted and resisted. Dug in my heels. Scoffed. Shook my head at the book when I would pass it in the store. That shake of the head that says, "you silly, silly, overly religious, altar-callin', holy-rollin', hellfirin' and brimstonin', misguided little book. I am much too jaded and worldly to get anything from you." Until a friend whose judgement I trust, who is in much the same place as I am religion-wise, asked me if I wanted to read it. She told me that she went into the book fully expecting to hate it, and then didn't. So I read it.

And I didn't hate it. I did not hate it. To be fair to the book, I found it to be none of the things I had thought it would be. Other than a tad overly descriptive. But when you're trying to describe heaven and God, I guess it's natural to get a little out there with the descriptions. And to quote King Julian, "After much deep and profound brain things inside my head", it made me realize that I need to forgive some folks.

Forgiveness, according to The Shack, is taking your hands from around the throat of another. I love that analogy. Think of the effort it takes to keep your hands around all the throats of all the people who may have wronged you. And seriously, who has that many arms? I'm not one of those great Hindu gods with all the arms. Just have two. What will I do with all the extra energy I have now that I'm not wasting it on strangling folks? The possibilities are staggering!

And before any of you in the peanut gallery pipe up, I am painfully aware that I need forgiveness too, but I'm not in charge of that part of the equation. I can only be in control of where my hands are, not where other people's are. Although, to carry the analogy further, being forgiven is very much like being able to take a deep breath again. I have been blessed to know that feeling.

There are many more thinks, yes thinks, that go into this. Does it matter if the forgivee knows you've forgiven them? Does it matter that the forgivee doesn't think they need to be forgiven? I guess the answer to those questions would be no, it only matters on the forgiver's end. The act of forgiveness is what sets one free to then live and love unconditionally. "Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass againt us." We forgive because we are forgiven. As we forgive, we are forgiven. Ooo, the churchy part of me is still there somewhere!

So, there you have it. Not a particularly funny post, but those will come soon enough. 2010 can't be all about the serious, can it? If it is, I want out right now, just sayin'.

Happy 2010! May we all find what we are looking for this year.

November First

Just holding my place.

I'm going to try to post everyday in the month of November.

More to follow...

The following is rated pg-13 for adult language

I'm fully prepared to say right here and right now that I probably need glasses. And I'm pretty sure that I've admitted to seeing "animals" on and near the trail as I'm running. But today was a stellar day in the "holy shit! what is that?" department.

At about mile 2 or so, I look down the trail and what do I see but a komodo dragon! A fucking komodo dragon! (I'm sure this idea is in my head because of a story a co-worker was telling me yesterday about a giant lizard her son had as a pet. This lizard went on walks on a leash around the neighborhood. It was allowed to live in her house until it lunged at her husband and tried to eat him. Her husband, very wisely I believe, banished this monster from their home.) So I'm all, "Now why did I leave the pepper spray in the van? How did a komodo dragon get to suburban St. Louis? Can I outrun it? Wasn't there a Johnny Quest episode with a komodo dragon?" And by the time I've thought all of that, I'm close enough to see that it is, in fact, not a komodo dragon, but a largish log sitting on its 4 prongy leg-like limbs. Ah, the relief. Ah the laughter! Oh ho ho! Hoo boy! How silly of me to think that the log was a man-eating reptile!

I continue on, smiling at myself for being so unbelievably silly! When what shows up on the trail ahead of me but an armadillo! But this time I'm prepared. I tell myself that I need to make an appointment with the eye doctor as soon as I get home. But then I get distracted by the thought of having to wear glasses while I run and how obnoxious that would be. And did I want to try to put contacts in? I get all freaked out about putting stuff on my eyeball. Yeeeks! And while I'm busy thinking all this, I run right up on the armadillo. A real live, dinosaur-looking, freakazoid armadillo! It starts running, I start yelling. It was a laugh riot for those who may have been watching. Those things can run too. Don't think they can't.

Run report and confession

Now some of you may be throwing your arms up in the air and yelling, "Good god, woman! No confessions! We don't want to know more than we already do!" Settle down there friends, it's a relatively, in the grand scheme of things, small confession. Here it is. Ready? I am pretty sure I will not be ready to run the half marathon in September. That sound you hear is me sighing dejectedly. And while this disappoints me to no end, I feel like it's better to be truthful with myself and face it and see where I can go from here.



Somewhere in the beginning of July, I fell off the training plan, hard. Hard enough to leave a mark, hard. But, I'm back at running, trying yet again. You haven't failed until you've given up completely. At least that's what I'm telling myself anyway. Forgive me, y'all.







And now, here is the report from today's steamy run:







There was no wildlife to be seen this morning. Unless insects count. About mile 2, when I thought it might just be more fun to sit down somewhere shady and have a nice glass of iced tea, a horsefly appeared. I believe that my friend Beth, with her amazing marathon running super-powers, sent it to get me to make sure I wouldn't stop running. That sumbitch chased me for a good half mile.







As there always is (and why don't I remember this on the days I don't want to run??), there was a gift from the Creator. In my ear, I hear a voice (yes, a voice. At least I'm not seeing things, sheesh) say, "Look to your left." So I turn my head and the voice says, "No you doofus, your other left!" (Sometimes the Almighty needs to call you a doofus, in an all-loving kind of way, of course.) And when I turn my head and look, this time to my actual left, there is a spider web. And not just your run-o-the-mill web either. It hung between two trees about 10 feet apart, and in the middle was a perfectly formed circle of web about 4 feet across. The filaments were so close together and the sun was hitting it perfectly and it shone like a jewel suspended there between the trees. A jewel or a cd. A giant, shiny cd hanging there. The king of all spiders must live in that palace of a web. Or queen. Magnificent. And I said, "Nicely done, Mr. Spider!" And then I said, "Thank you" to the Creator. You understand that I say these things to myself. I don't want to scare the regulars that share the trail with me.







Oh yeah, did I mention I did the trail backward today? Started at the finish and went to the start. It made everything look different.







That's enough outta you, jane.

Food, glorious food!

I love food!

How cute is this heart-shaped goat cheese from a local cheesemaker?

Dinner last night was so good. We had tuna, marinated for a short time in lime juice and soy sauce (Mr. Bittman, you're a genius!) We then cooked it on the grill.

And then made a lovely pasta with these ingredients. The cheese and the whole wheat pasta were bought at the farmer's market yesterday morning. The woman selling the cheese happened to be right next to the pasta seller. She saw me buy the linguini and said that the chive chevre and some butter would make a wonderful sauce for it. Twist my arm! Butter and goat cheese? How could that be bad? I used about half of the cheese and about 3 TBS of butter. Salt and pepper finished it off.
Here is the finished dinner. It included these wonderful green beans, also bought at the farmer's market.


I didn't eat all of my tuna, which made my husband very happy. He gladly finished the rest!

Can't wait to eat the rest of my farmer's market finds!

Wildlife and pseudo-wildlife I saw on my run this morning

Ok, in the real life wildlife category we have a lovely bluebird. Said bluebird followed me by hopping from fence post to fence post until he ran out of posts and flew up into the trees. He made me smile and did not poop on my head as I feared he might. He also made me say, "Thank you!" to the Creator. (Does that count as church?) Also real was the thing in the tall grass by the railroad tracks that I have no idea what it was. It was huge and flat and disappeared into the grass. A giant turtle? Perplexing! Lots of birds and squirrels and a rabbit also were around this morning.


Pseudo wildlife include sawhorses that I thought were deer, a log I thought was an armadillo, and a stick I thought was a snake. You might say I need glasses, I say it was freakin' early and the sweat was in my eyes! All in all a very good run!

2009

Let's try this again, shall we?

Number 9. Number 9.

What's that you say? Where in the h-e-double hockey sticks have I been? Recovering from the half marathon, obviously! Has it really taken me 2 MONTHS to recover? Nah, but I've been busy doing other stuff. And what if it did take me 2 months to recover? 13.1 is a long, long way to run! It's fa!

And now that I have recovered, the Southsiders have decided to train for the Lewis and Clark half marathon in September. Only this time we are walk/running it. The plan (as far as I know the plan. I just kind of follow along.) is to walk a mile, run a mile repeatedly until we've gone 13.1 miles. And I have to say that there was absolutely no alcohol involved in the decision to do this. But I may have been high on endorphins at the time! Anyway, we've started the training. We're running 2 mornings (soon to be 3 mornings) a week and doing a long run/walk on the weekends. The cussing has already begun, and it wasn't by me. I don't start cussing until mile 11 or so, and then I cuss like a sailor! It's good times! Go Southsiders!

And now, let's get to the real reason for this post (which I tried to write last week, and blogger had apparently lost it's mind and wouldn't let me. But I digress...). My Ike is 9 years old! He turned nine last week, and I just don't know where the time has gone! My little man who made such a dramatic entrance into the world is now 9 years old!

He is such a great kid! He loves to make people laugh and tell a story. He talks too much at school, but the teacher can't discipline him because, "what he says is just so interesting or funny that I find myself listening to what he says instead of telling him to be quiet." Thanks, Mrs. B! Just a reminder to Ike, your fourth grade teacher may not be quite so lenient. Just sayin'. And he's kind and loving too. What a great combination! He's a boy to be proud of, and we are!

Here is a picture of Ike on his birthday. Yes, he is decorating his own cake, with help from his big brother. He also helped make it! He loves to cook!

Grandmas and Grandpa came and there was good food and cake and LEGOS! And more LEGOS! All dedicated to Indiana Jones. It was a great birthday all around!

Ahoy mateys, you must see some photos from Pirate camp. Shiver me timbers, they had a great time! Thanks Captain Tomato Patch for such a fun week! AARGH!

And with that, my friends, I am outta here!

Mmmmwah! (Yes, she IS unbelievably cute!)

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!

Let's see,the holiest day of the year+ family+good friends+love+CANDY+good food+laughter+adorable children=one fantastic holiday!

Easter is my favorite church holiday. All the great music and pageantry, how can you not be moved by that? And all the beautiful little girls in their sherbet colored dresses and little boys dressed up in their ties and sport coats-how sweet!

And CANDY! Let's not forget the CANDY!

We enjoyed a great meal at my brother Steve's house. Where we had an outdoor Easter egg hunt in between snow squalls. Snow on Easter is just not right! Thank you, Global warming.

So, here are a few pictures from the day. Hope you enjoy them! Susan's braided bread. It was as delicious as it was beautiful! It looks like a playboy model just posin' there all seductive-like!

Here's a nice picture of my gang all dressed up for Easter. And we get the added bonus of having pretty little Ceecee in the picture with us. She took a shine to Russ after he taught her Sunday school class last week and wanted to be in the picture with us!

The following are Easter egg hunt pictures from Steve and Pattie's house. Look at that little girl on her first egg hunt!
And since we haven't been able to say this for the past 40 days,

Allelulia!!!!!

Warning! Parental bragging ahead!

It's been a fews day without a post about my wonderful children, and I know you are just biting your fingernails down to the nubs in anticipation of a new one!



It just so happens that a piece of Ike's artwork was entered by his art teacher into the Mastadon Art and Science fair. (Sam's science project was not picked to go, but he was ROBBED, I tell ya!)


Anyway, we went as a family to view his artwork at the fair last Saturday. Here is a lovely shot his 3D cookie watch picture:

I have to tell you that the idea of a cookie watch is just brilliant! It tells the time and functions as a snack all in one. I suppose it wouldn't be very practical as it would be a one use item, but still, it's brilliant! (Hey, it's my kid, I'm supposed to use brilliant 3 times in 4 sentences when I talk about him!)

When we visited the art fair, the exhibits had not been judged. But on Thursday, in the parking lot of Shop n Save, we found out from Ms. Falconnier (the world's coolest art teacher) that Ike had gotten first place!

I'm pretty sure that Shop n Save is not an official location for the award ceremony of the Mastadon art fair, but since we had parked right next to Ms. Falconnier, and she had the awards in her car, we had the medal bestowing right there next to the cart corral!

Unfortunately, I was unprepared for the impromptu award ceremony and did not have my camera. But here is a picture of the proud young man and his blue ribbon at home:

Congratulations, Ike!

Super Sunday!

No, this isn't another post about the Super Bowl. And I'm feeling chatty, so just settle in for a long post.

It's about the great day that was yesterday.

We celebrated Ike's first Holy Communion and finally had Sam's postponed birthday party.

It was one of those days that is stellar from beginning to end. Smiles all around and even a few tears of joy...

Here's a picture of the first Communicants:

I have to tell you that being able to celebrate this milestone with such a wonderful group of friends made the day even more special!

There was a cake at church after the service(were you able to get the cake Jacquie??):


And then we had a party for both boys at home.

This is a fantastic photo of Sam. He is getting ready to blow out his candles (really? That explains the cake with all the candles on it.), but under the table is a cell phone that he has used to dial our house phone which is why he is looking to his right, that is where the phone is.


I was rushing to the phone and he was getting a big kick out of tricking his mother. When you are 11, fooling your mother is just about the funniest thing ever! Anyway, I love the mischievious grin on his face that shows off his dimples.

Here's one more picture of Ike on his big day:

Isn't he the handsome young man? How can he be old enough for his first Communion?

It's a blessing that my boys are surrounded by family and friends that love and support them as they grow up!

In short (too late, Jane, too late), a good time was had by all.

On a scale of 1-10, he's 11!

So I suck (children don't say suck, it's not a nice word) at the blog upkeep.

Sorry, sorry!

Several fun events have come and gone since the last post. See future posts for details. You all are patiently waiting, I'm sure.

Most important would be that my oldest son is now 11! How did that happen?

Here's a photo of his reaction to opening his favorite birthday gift-a chess set! But it's not just ANY chess set, it is a LEGO chess set (more LEGOs, just what our house needs!). You all are now swooning over the coolness of this present, I know.

Happy 11th birthday, young man! We love you!!

She's number 1! She's number 1!

Happy Birthday, my pretty!

Yes, we had cake, and Riah LOVED it!

Here's the birthday princess working the tiara!

Here's the birthday girl on her actual birthday. She was quite happy to be having pancakes for dinner!

Gentlemen, start your engines

Pinewood Derby cars

No, we didn't win. Not even one race. We suck at making fast cars apparently.

And even though Sam's car is emblazoned with the Cross, God was not showing any partiality at the races on Saturday. He got the award for Best Fuel Economy. That is the nice cub scout way of saying SLOWEST. He likes the trophy, so keep your pity!

Ike's car, as one of the other moms said, "shows he's a free spirit." Yeah, that's it.

At least our boys actually made their own cars. The winner of the most creative car came from a first grader whose car was a subway sandwich, complete with the curly lettuce leaves sticking out from the bun (which had tiny little seeds on it). This thing looked like a real subway sandwich. With wheels. Which is the only thing that would stop you from picking it up and trying to eat it. Going out on a limb here, but I'm pretty sure the 7 year old didn't carve the sandwich himself.

Zoom, zoom, zoom!

It is finished!!

Here is the photographic evidence! The science fair project is completed!

praise the lard!