Just holding my place.
I'm going to try to post everyday in the month of November.
More to follow...
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Friday, August 28, 2009
The following is rated pg-13 for adult language
I'm fully prepared to say right here and right now that I probably need glasses. And I'm pretty sure that I've admitted to seeing "animals" on and near the trail as I'm running. But today was a stellar day in the "holy shit! what is that?" department.
At about mile 2 or so, I look down the trail and what do I see but a komodo dragon! A fucking komodo dragon! (I'm sure this idea is in my head because of a story a co-worker was telling me yesterday about a giant lizard her son had as a pet. This lizard went on walks on a leash around the neighborhood. It was allowed to live in her house until it lunged at her husband and tried to eat him. Her husband, very wisely I believe, banished this monster from their home.) So I'm all, "Now why did I leave the pepper spray in the van? How did a komodo dragon get to suburban St. Louis? Can I outrun it? Wasn't there a Johnny Quest episode with a komodo dragon?" And by the time I've thought all of that, I'm close enough to see that it is, in fact, not a komodo dragon, but a largish log sitting on its 4 prongy leg-like limbs. Ah, the relief. Ah the laughter! Oh ho ho! Hoo boy! How silly of me to think that the log was a man-eating reptile!
I continue on, smiling at myself for being so unbelievably silly! When what shows up on the trail ahead of me but an armadillo! But this time I'm prepared. I tell myself that I need to make an appointment with the eye doctor as soon as I get home. But then I get distracted by the thought of having to wear glasses while I run and how obnoxious that would be. And did I want to try to put contacts in? I get all freaked out about putting stuff on my eyeball. Yeeeks! And while I'm busy thinking all this, I run right up on the armadillo. A real live, dinosaur-looking, freakazoid armadillo! It starts running, I start yelling. It was a laugh riot for those who may have been watching. Those things can run too. Don't think they can't.
At about mile 2 or so, I look down the trail and what do I see but a komodo dragon! A fucking komodo dragon! (I'm sure this idea is in my head because of a story a co-worker was telling me yesterday about a giant lizard her son had as a pet. This lizard went on walks on a leash around the neighborhood. It was allowed to live in her house until it lunged at her husband and tried to eat him. Her husband, very wisely I believe, banished this monster from their home.) So I'm all, "Now why did I leave the pepper spray in the van? How did a komodo dragon get to suburban St. Louis? Can I outrun it? Wasn't there a Johnny Quest episode with a komodo dragon?" And by the time I've thought all of that, I'm close enough to see that it is, in fact, not a komodo dragon, but a largish log sitting on its 4 prongy leg-like limbs. Ah, the relief. Ah the laughter! Oh ho ho! Hoo boy! How silly of me to think that the log was a man-eating reptile!
I continue on, smiling at myself for being so unbelievably silly! When what shows up on the trail ahead of me but an armadillo! But this time I'm prepared. I tell myself that I need to make an appointment with the eye doctor as soon as I get home. But then I get distracted by the thought of having to wear glasses while I run and how obnoxious that would be. And did I want to try to put contacts in? I get all freaked out about putting stuff on my eyeball. Yeeeks! And while I'm busy thinking all this, I run right up on the armadillo. A real live, dinosaur-looking, freakazoid armadillo! It starts running, I start yelling. It was a laugh riot for those who may have been watching. Those things can run too. Don't think they can't.
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